| i've written a letter and sent it to some of my
friends. The replies might surprise you...
The first reply came from Sir Red
|If I understand you correctly, you know that whatever games you play that include a
safeword that will be respected are just games. You haven't really submitted at all. In
fact, it's your lover who has submitted to you setting the limits. You're still in
control, but you'd like to find out what it would be like to submit for real to something
you can't control. You've discovered that sometimes a little pain can be sexually
exciting, and you want to know if being hurt more than you would agree to could be even
more sexually stimulating. Have I read you right?
that and my desire to see if i really want to be a slave.
Funny, wasn't I talking about this back on Feb 3 when I wrote:
"You don't want to admit it, because you don't want to get lumped in with
the S/M people, but you've discovered that they are right about the fact that under the
right circumstances, pain can be sexual and pleasurable, when it's the right component of
a sexually charged situation.
We only have four types of nerves for sensation: heat, cold, light touch and heavy
pressure. There are no pleasure or pain nerves. It's all in our interpretation. Light
touch is great if it's a caress but not if it's an itch or being tickled. Heavy pressure
is great when it's the right part of a message or in the advanced stages of sex, but
Sensation is sensation, and excitement is excitement. What kind is up to how we interpret
it. What's been described as the "Fight or Flight" response, really should be
described with three "F" words. The dilated pupils, sweating and rapid breathing
from rage, fear, pain or sexual excitement don't just look the same; they are the
||So far, it sounds like I'm trying to encourage S&M experimentation, but I'm not.
I'm just trying to show how understandable it is. You don't have to have personality
defects or hidden hostilities or self-destructive urges to enjoy S&M activities. On
the other hand, you really don't want to start reinforcing self-destructive feelings or
hostilities by pairing them with sexual pleasure and orgasms either.
|Take your time. Plan carefully. Use good judgement. Err on the side of caution rather
than excess. Experiment. Have fun. Remember not to blame each other if every experiment
doesn't work out.
i know that.
And don't forget to share all the juicy details with me!
i will, giggle
...and don't pout!
Well i guess he sure told me, huh? It's ok, i know he's
concerned. S&M can mess with your mind. That's to be expected - it's high-powered
Drop me a line. i plan to do this soon, with Rob. Hopefully i can get some more of my
friends to give me advice on how to make this into something good and full of love...