Advice

The shevette show To get whipped or not...

Welcome to the shevette show!

When you need advice you go to your friends, when it's really really personal you go to your mom... when it's about something like S&M you go to your friends on the net!

S & M
Real - Life
shevette the newbie!

shevette the newbie!

shevette the newbie!

shevette the newbie!

shevette the newbie!

shevette the newbie!

shevette the newbie!

Should i do this? i've written a letter and sent it to some of my friends. The replies might surprise you...

The first reply came from Sir Red

If I understand you correctly, you know that whatever games you play that include a safeword that will be respected are just games. You haven't really submitted at all. In fact, it's your lover who has submitted to you setting the limits. You're still in control, but you'd like to find out what it would be like to submit for real to something you can't control. You've discovered that sometimes a little pain can be sexually exciting, and you want to know if being hurt more than you would agree to could be even more sexually stimulating. Have I read you right?

Yes, there's that and my desire to see if i really want to be a slave.

Funny, wasn't I talking about this back on Feb 3 when I wrote:

Should i do this?


"You don't want to admit it, because you don't want to get lumped in with the S/M people, but you've discovered that they are right about the fact that under the right circumstances, pain can be sexual and pleasurable, when it's the right component of a sexually charged situation.
[...]
We only have four types of nerves for sensation: heat, cold, light touch and heavy pressure. There are no pleasure or pain nerves. It's all in our interpretation. Light touch is great if it's a caress but not if it's an itch or being tickled. Heavy pressure is great when it's the right part of a message or in the advanced stages of sex, but otherwise painful.
[...]
Sensation is sensation, and excitement is excitement. What kind is up to how we interpret it. What's been described as the "Fight or Flight" response, really should be described with three "F" words. The dilated pupils, sweating and rapid breathing from rage, fear, pain or sexual excitement don't just look the same; they are the same."


Should i do this? So far, it sounds like I'm trying to encourage S&M experimentation, but I'm not. I'm just trying to show how understandable it is. You don't have to have personality defects or hidden hostilities or self-destructive urges to enjoy S&M activities. On the other hand, you really don't want to start reinforcing self-destructive feelings or hostilities by pairing them with sexual pleasure and orgasms either.

Yes Sir.

Take your time. Plan carefully. Use good judgement. Err on the side of caution rather than excess. Experiment. Have fun. Remember not to blame each other if every experiment doesn't work out.

i know that.

And don't forget to share all the juicy details with me!

i will, giggle

Sir Red

...and don't pout!

Should i do this?
Should i do this?

Well i guess he sure told me, huh? It's ok, i know he's concerned. S&M can mess with your mind. That's to be expected - it's high-powered stuff!


Drop me a line. i plan to do this soon, with Rob. Hopefully i can get some more of my friends to give me advice on how to make this into something good and full of love...


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Am i tied up good or what?